I'm Pretty Sure They're Just Plastic, Right?

So, for weeks I've been seeing these billboards around town wherein Ken - you know the one, as in Barbie and Ken - has been trying to woo Barbie back by strategically placing signs all over for her to see.


First of all, when did they break up?


And if they did, who can really blame Barbie? I mean, they did kinda gay Ken up, right?


Second of all, how does he know where she'll be? Isn't that kinda up to whoever's driving her around?


Finally, um, they're dolls. Look, I loved Barbie just as much as anyone growing up, but it's still not going to make it OK to pretend they're some star-crossed lovers and not what they really are...which is plastic.


Even featuring them on people.com isn't going to make them any more real to me, m'kay? THEY'RE STILL DOLLS!!!