Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Things That Cause Me Grief

Lately there've been several things causing me grief. So as not to bore you with a neverending diatribe, I'll sum up my Top Three Things That Cause Me Grief below (in no particular order):1) Conflict resolution. I’m not going to lie – I’m terrible at resolving an issue with someone close to me in a rational manner. I try to, I really do, but no matter how much I plan it out in my head, it comes out as a scrambled, yelling mess. How do I fix this? Last night I tried to have an adult, mature conversation with the friend who’s been staying at the Pink Palace (for WAY past the acceptable amount of time). Instead of saying the speech in my head which I'd been planning for days, it came out as, “I spent all weekend cleaning up after you!” Yeah, that’s productive. Seriously, I give up. 2) Lemon Sugar and Vanilla Lotion. Oh, crap. Why must you torture me, Victoria’s Secret? Why? Why?! It’s bad enough that you have my beloved Pink line of fun things, but to add a lemon sugar scent – you must know that’s my #1 weakness. Does anyone else remember my temporary insanity in regards to the Hello Sugar lotion? Yeah, it’s going to be like that again, I can just feel like it. Oh, and lest you think the scents will be different, they won’t. You see, Bath & Body Works (home of my now-discontinued Hello Sugar) is owned by the exact same company as Victoria’s Secret. Therefore, same scents in different bottles. Damn marketing ploy. Seriously, when I opened up the catalog today and saw Lemon Sugar, I verbally shouted, “NO!” I just know it's not going to be pretty. Resistance is futile.3) Stupid tires. Stupid cars. Did I tell you I hit a cinder block/brick thing a few weeks back? Shockingly, my tire didn’t pop, but my car’s been shaking ever since. Yesterday I had it looked at and guess what? I dented the rim. Brilliant! When the mechanic came over to tell me “Your rim is bent,” I was like, “What does that mean?” So he repeated himself, “Your rim is bent.” Um, genius, I’m aware of what those words mean, I just don’t know what that means to my car. Can you drive on a bent rim? Does it need to be replaced? What are the next steps? See, these are the things I was trying to get you to answer, not repeat the same useless phrase 500 times. Idiot.

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