Monday, August 24, 2009
How to Stop Making the Same Mistakes.....
This is what I learned in therapy today: That despite consciously knowing what mistakes I make, I continue to make them over and over. Well, this isn't really news. I'm always aware that I'm doing something stupid; I just don't seem to know how to stop doing it. How does one consciously choose to be a mess? Apparently, the root of all my problems is myself and the solution to all my problems is also myself. That's a lot of pressure. Doesn't she realize I'm a disaster? That I'm not logical? That I think too literally? That I'd rather continue making the same mistakes than make some major change and uproot my life? Probably not. She is trying to help me, after all. I'm the one resisting all the change.
The interesting part was learning how to self-sooth. Apparently I'm not good at that either and look to external forces to calm me down. I now have the task of deep breathing and positive self-talk. Man, I sound like a shrink, huh? Wish me luck! :)
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