How to be the Perfect Facebook Friend

It occured to me last night that Facebook is really like a big, neverending party (where you run into practically everyone you've ever met). I mean, when you're at a party, the ideal situation when you see someone you haven't seen for a long time is to have a short conversation, catch-up, and then be on your way. This is my favorite thing about Facebook - when you find a long lost acquaintance, you have the inital friend request, a wall post (or message) or two, but then you're done. Please feel free to peruse their pictures and see what they're up to at your leisure, but your initial obligation is over. You don't have to talk every day from then on - really, the only thing you should do is probably send a birthday message (but even then, that's up to you). Catch up and move on. Perfect.What you don't want in a person at a party is the same thing you don't want as a Facebook friend - someone who stays around long after the conversation has ended, says stupid stuff (read: annoying and constant status updates), and isn't interesting at all. I've got several Facebook friends that I'd never want hanging around me at a party and have long overstayed their welcome in my good graces. They need to be schooled in being a better Facebook friend because, quite frankly, I'm sick of their crap.