Like My New Look?

Yeah, I got tired of having a blog that looked like everyone else's (the background, that is - what I write, of course, is completely unique and hilarious....at least in my own mind). So, I found this great link for free blog layouts at: http://leeloublogs.blogspot.com/ Amy - thanks for the great tip! She linked it on her blog today and I'm in the love with the site (just what I need - something new to play with online). Check it out! Super fun to play with (and I didn't lose any of my sidebar stuff, which was of major importance in my blog background selection).

It's Official - Check Me Into Facebook Rehab

Something is seriously wrong with me (I mean, more than usual). It seems as though if I go for more than five minutes away from Facebook I start to have withdrawals. Something must be done. I need to pull the plug, cut the cord, walk away from the Facebook. Oh, but I'm in the middle of a game of Scrabble with McHeidi - surely that can't wait. Plus, we can even live chat while playing! What could be better? Obviously I'm in need of an intervention, but, then again, if it's keeping me away from CL (like anything could keep me away from CL??), all the better, right? And no, if you don't already know what CL is, I'm not going to tell you. A girl needs to have some secrets.

Mary Sounds Like a Raging You-Know-What

From http://www.foundmagazine.com/ - is it just me, or is Mary a beast from hell? Why respond at all?

No, We Didn't Call Each Other and Plan It

My friend Angie and I happen to both be wearing blue today. Not just blue, but the exact same color of blue. I've got a blue dress and she has a blue shirt and skirt. No real concern, except we always hang out together - we get our water together in the morning, we eat lunch together, we walk to the bank and the company store together....you get the point. So, all day long, people have been exclaiming, "You're matching! Did you call each other and plan it?! Tee hee hee." Now, it might have been funny the first 1,000 times we heard it, but now it's just annoying. Can't anyone come up with anything more original? No, we didn't plan it. No, we didn't call each other. Yes, you are retarded.

This Fills Me With Hope

I love this quote: "We were just two lonely people who went, 'Ah, there you are'"

- Nicole Kidman on recognizing her soul mate in husband Keith Urban

This Picture Always Makes Me Smile

Enough said. I love my girls.

Happy Thursday (my Friday!)

Today is my Friday and I'm very happy about that! Working 9.5 to 10 hours a day is for the birds. Combine that with my less than stellar sleep of late and it hasn't been a productive week. Luckily, last night I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow - happy days!!! Plus, I think I've almost got everything ready for my trip. All I need to do now is mapquest, pack, and load up the car. Wahoo! :) California, here I come!

An Open Letter

Dear Elderly-Portly-Half-Naked-Bald-Man-Doing-Yoga-In-The-Park, Congratulations on finding an exercise you obviously love and thrive on doing. I applaud your effort and enthusiasm, especially on such a hot afternoon. In the future, please spare the rest of the viewing public (especially small, frightened children) the sight of your less-than-stellar bare body wearing super short black, tight shorts while doing the downward dog position on the lawn. Perhaps there's a backyard in your nursing home you could use instead? Or maybe you could visit the park after the sun goes down and you're not directly next to the playground? I almost lost my lunch as I walked by you today (but like a car accident, I couldn't stop staring at your stark white rotund body). Just a thought. Thanks so much. Sincerely, The General Public of Common Decency P.S. To the creepy, skeevy perv sitting in his black truck with the hood slightly askew every day in the same position: WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?!!? I'm fairly certain you've got candy in your truck and are trying to lure innocent children away with it. I have no doubt that you're the person my mother warned me about. Are you in cahoots with the Boogey Man?

There's Nothing Quite as Sweet as a Friend

Despite my complaining about how much I've yet to do, I really am excited to see my girls this weekend. I was really lucky to find my core group of girlfriends at a young age - most of my best friends I met in Junior High and High School. It was just so natural to us that we didn't realize it wasn't something unique until we'd gone off to college and met people who'd already forgotten their friends from home. To us it just came second nature and it still does. Friends forever, no questions asked. It's a wonderful feeling to have such a supportive group of people in your life. Although not everyone shown in these pictures can make it (due to distance or other commitments), I know it's going to be a great time. I can't wait!

Why Does He Torture Me So???

Listen, Dylan (okay....Luke Perry), just suck it up, go back on 90210, be married to Kelly Taylor, living happily ever after, and no one gets hurt. Can you do that for me? Thanks. That'd be GREAT.

I Don't Care What You Say, Midgets = Funny

Apparently I'm in an odd mood.

Too Stupid to Live

Overheard at the dollar store today:

Customer: "How much is this?"

Dollar Store Employee: "One dollar."

Um, hi, Stupid Man over there, it's a dollar store. Everything is a dollar. Surprise!

Of course, I suppose it could've been worse. He could have been a contestant on a national TV show. Everytime I look at her face I start to laugh. :)

Well, Well, Well - Look Who's a Snowboarder Now!

Look at that: DeAnna is snowboarding on her own!! So cool. And even in a little cute outfit. If that's not true love, I don't know what is. As a side and related note (since it's about the Bachelor), there's a great article on http://www.people.com/ regarding who should get the engagement ring after Shayne and Matt broke up. Shayne thinks she should keep it and insists Matt is OK with it. Matt, however, said that's bollocks (I'm paraphrasing, but you get the gist) and she should give it to charity. He did admit that the show bought the ring (something I've always wondered), so he doesn't want it back, but since it's a symbol of a marriage that didn't take place, she should auction it off for a good cause. Go, Matt! Someone's got his knickers in a twist.

Did Being a Caveman, Tarzan, or a Mummy Fighter Do Him In?

You know, there was a time when I thought Brendan Frasier was a tasty little treat. When he was in Encino Man and was transformed into a hottie? Yum. When he played Tarzan and showed his sexy chest? Yes, please. When he mastered swing dancing in that movie with Alicia Silverstone? Oh, my. And as a Mummy slayer? Delicious. However....let's discuss his appearance at the premiere of Mummy 3. My hell. What happened? That's just a world of NO. Maria Bello, however, is brilliant. Look how beautiful and radiant she is. You'd never know that she was 41 (and recently engaged to a 28-year-old.....she's an inspiration to us all). When I met her at Sundance, she was a peach. I TLF Maria Bello. But, Brendan Frasier, alas, I'm afraid our love affair is over. Take care. And maybe look into some hair plugs? Or a hat? I'm just saying. No one's falling for the spikey do. You're 39. Seriously. Read my lips: NO.

No Sleep Makes for a Grumpy Pinky

I have so much to do before my trip this weekend. It boggles my mind how much I have to do to prepare to see my girls - packing, scrapbooking, shopping, organizing, planning, and the list goes on and on. I realize it may not sound like much, but I'm leaving tomorrow and haven't done one thing. Factor in the sad fact that my productivity level is close to nil considering my lack of sleep and it's not a good day. I'm a grumpy bear and every little thing is bugging me so far today. Time Warp girl scraping every last drop out of her yogurt? Annoying. The guy in the meeting who has to play with a Slinky (loudly, no less) to bide his time? Lame. I did go for coffee and a walk (at Liberty Park, of course!) last night with a new guy. Yeah, he was 25, so I'm now officially a cougar. At least he was pretty, almost too pretty, and kind of in love with himself. I took a picture of him and when he saw it, he actually exclaimed how much he loved himself. Yikes. If that's not a red flag, I'm not sure what is.

Sleep, Sleep, Wherefore Art Thou, Sleep??

You're welcome. It's good to know that I can't sleep to save my life, but I can certainly grab a camera and upload a picture in the middle of the night. At least I have priorities, right?

Three Cheers for New Toys!

Behold, my beautiful new iPhone. Isn't it pretty? I love new toys so much. Every new gadget just brings a smile to my face. Sad, I know, that my life is such that I'm overjoyed by every electronic-device-of-the-week. Oh well. Whatever floats your boat, right? So far the restore is not going so well, but at least I backed up my contacts, right? Even if it doesn't work, I won't lose my entire mind, only half of it. That's a good start.

China is Definitely Ready for Tourists

What on earth???

Perhaps they also serve Robster at Cindy Ree's?

I'm not entering from the back, I'll tell you that! :)

Interesting name...And where would you prefer that I die?

What's a crippie? Is that considered PC?

I'm not holding this in my hands!

The Genius Bar is Genius

Last night I had to take my ailing iPhone and my dad's shuffle into the Apple store to be looked at by "The Genius Bar." Have you ever gone to one of these things?!?! It's SO cool! Basically it's a bar set up in your local Apple store with resident Apple experts and you bring them your problems (computer, iPod, iPhone, what have you) and they fix them. Easy as that! I've tried to go in the past, but forgot to make an appointment and could never get it, so yesterday I made sure to plan ahead. What a breeze! I got right in, they diagnosed the shuffle (bad cord, gave me a new one), and wanted to give me a new iPhone on the spot. Of course, my faint heart couldn't quite make the switch until I knew all my contacts were safe and sound, so I've been updating them all morning. Man, I know a lot of people! Who knew I was quite so popular?? :) When I pick up the new iPhone this afternoon (fingers crossed!) everything should (that being the operative word) transfer right over. Everyone think happy, positive thoughts that my phone transition will be a smooth one. Oh, and, no, I'm not upgrading to the new new iPhone, I'm just getting a new one since my old one came askew in the back. It still works, but it makes me nervous to have the insides all exposed like that. Hence, the new phone (for free since it's under warranty - yay!).

Working in a Cubicle Farm is Truly a Joy

There are some days when being at work is somewhat pleasant (well, for it being work) and tolerable and then there are days like today. For some reason, I am seated in between a few of the loudest, rudest people on earth. Bless their hearts, I don't think they realize how vile and miserable they are, but they truly make my ears bleed. On one side, we have the not-only-am-I-loud-but-I-think-it's-OK-to-talk-with-my-mouth-full-of-food girl. On another side, we have clips-her-nails-at-her-desk-despite-the-fact-that-it's-the-most-annoying-noise-on-earth girl. To combat these barbaric noises, I quietly sit in

my cubicle blasting my iPod louder than any iPod should ever be played. I'm positive I'm losing my hearing by each passing second, but it's worth it to avoid listening to the no-manners-twins around me. One of these days I'm afraid I'm going to snap (who, me?) and bite their heads off and when that day comes they'll most likely run away whimpering because the mean pink lady lost her damn mind and went bat-shit crazy on the entire cubicle farm. It will not be a pretty sight to be sure. Hopefully it won't come to that, but you never know. Perhaps I can refer them to some sort of charm school. Do they still have those? I can mysteriously leave coupons to charm school on their desks. Yes, that would be completely subtle and appropriate. Why didn't I think of it before??

I Might be Too Old to Rollerblade

Wouldn't that be funny if all I did was post the "Not talking to you" picture and proceeded to refrain from blogging the rest of the day? Like that would happen. It's funny to consider though!

Big news - I didn't crash into anything as I bladed around the park yesterday - yay for me! In fact, I was lucky to find Blader there and he helped me with my skates - they'd come loose and apparently were lacking some wheel grease. Whatever that means. So, he fixed me up and we bladed around the park together. Since he normally goes super fast, I'm sure hanging with me was cramping his style, but it was fun nonetheless. However, today, I'm questioning my whole "rollerblading for senior citizens idea" (since, as we all know, I am 100). My body is crying out in pain and asking me what on earth I was thinking. I have no response to such pleas, wussy body. Leave me alone.

Betsey Johnson is my New Hero

So, I was feeling like doing an afternoon tribute to the color pink today (well, and every day for that matter) when I came across these amazing pictures of Betsey Johnson's pink apartment. Betsey Johnson is a fashion designer, so she must have some design sense, right? :) Oh, and if I were in the army (I think that's what this picture is going for), I'd totally be rocking this look (on a pink tank!!).

Yep, I've Heard That One Before

This past weekend I went out with the "great response guy" and, true to form, he was hilarious, good company, and a fantastic dinner companion. The trouble? Well, a few weeks ago we'd talked on the phone for, like, three hours (I know) and during our conversation he told me a myriad of hysterical and interesting stories. Now, while they were hysterical and interesting the first time I heard them, when I was listening to them again during dinner, I didn't find them quite so funny. In fact, I kept trying to figure out a way to tell the person I'd JUST met that I'd already heard that story. And that one. And, yes, that one, as well. Bless his heart. Aside from that, we had a nice time (and a three hour dinner), but trust me when I say the conversation was not coming from my side of the table (which is rare for anyone who knows me). 28 is still convinced I'm too skinny. I'm not sure how to get him to knock that crap off, because it's just annoying. And also, definitely not true. That convent is looking better and better to me.

Time Warp Girl Smells Like 1987

As I was passing Time Warp Girl in the cafeteria this morning, it occurred to me that she smells exactly like 1987. I'm not sure how to explain it, except that when I was in Junior High I used to wear this body spray which smelled like baby powder. At least her outfit is fairly normal today, unlike Friday when she rolled her jeans up to her knees - now that was a bold move. Yes, my fascination with her grows with every passing day.

Awesome Tribute or Horrible Idea? I Can't Decide

Has anyone seen the J.C. Penney's commercial which is based on The Breakfast Club movie? While initially amused to see anything reference such a theatrical masterpiece, I'm not sure having kids (who were born well after 1985 and therefore have no idea what they're doing or what movie they're ripping off) dance around and pretend to be characters on the movie is such a good idea. In fact, upon further reflection, I've decided I hate it. OK, OK, hate is pretty strong, but this was an R-rated movie to begin with. Why is JCP (their trendy new slogan) trying to use an R-rated movie to promote conformity? And isn't the entire theme of my beloved The Breakfast Club about embracing individualism and loving who you are (and not where you fit in)? I know, I know, pointing out that the movie was R-rated could possibly put me into a prude category, but so be it. The movie is 23 years old, for goodness sakes. I just don't understand why it's being brought back from the dead now.